The Burkiss Way to Dynamic Transcripting

… starring Denise Coffey, Jo Kendall, Chris Emmett, Nigel Rees and Fred Harris.
These transcripts are mine, as are any errors or omissions. The material contained therein though of course isn’t, and is entirely to blame on the mad of brain men Andrew Marshall and David Renwick, with additional material by John Mason, Colin Bostock-Smith, Douglas Adams, John Lloyd, Tom Magee Englefield and Liz Pollock.

The blurb at the top of each transcript is copied from the respective episode’s Radio Times listing as obtained from BBC Genome. It turns out though that the humorous programme descriptions mostly stop past series two, but at least it provides a place for the key to the colour-coding[1] used to identify who’s voicing which character.[2]

Thanks go to Darren Lee, Ian Zalicks and Andre Willey for offering up a number of corrections, and to Steve Arnold for allowing use of his episode guide as a basis for the sketch listings at the start of each episode.

Dedicated to the memory of Tinni, who got me started onto British radio comedy.

For comments, suggestions, contributions, error corrections etc. contact me at burkissway ( at ) buttercookie ( dot ) de.

Episode list

Episodes marked ✔︎ have been completed and are available as nicely formatted HTML files (unless marked ✔︎✎︎, in which case they’re still awaiting conversion to HTML).
Episodes marked ✎︎ are in the process of being transcribed and hence are a) incomplete and b) only available as unformatted text files. And episodes marked ❌︎ are completely unavailable for the time being.

Status Lesson Date Title
The Half-Open University
Burkiss Way Series 1
✔︎127/08/76Peel Bananas the Burkiss Way
✔︎23/09/76Pass Examinations the Burkiss Way
✔︎310/09/76Escape from Prison the Burkiss Way
✔︎417/09/76Solve Murders the Burkiss Way
✔︎524/09/76Keep Unfit the Burkiss Way
✔︎61/10/76Win Awards the Burkiss Way
Burkiss Way Series 2
✔︎715/12/76Influence Friends and Win People the Burkiss Way
✔︎822/12/76Plan Christmas Schedules the Burkiss Way
✔︎929/12/76Gain Spiritual Fulfilment the Burkiss Way
✔︎105/01/77Govern Britain the Burkiss Way
✔︎1112/01/77Journey Into the Unknown the Burkiss Way
✔︎1219/01/77Make Short Comedy Programmes the Burkiss Way
✔︎1326/01/77Commemorate Jubilees the Burkiss Way
✔︎142/02/77Do-You-Know-What the Burkiss Way
✔︎159/02/77Skive from School the Burkiss Way
✔︎1616/02/77Get Off with Life the Burkiss Way
✔︎1723/02/77This is Your Life the Burkiss Way
✔︎182/03/77Become a Rock Star the Burkiss Way
✔︎199/03/77Replace The Burkiss Way
Burkiss Way Series 3
✔︎2015/11/77Discover Gravity the Burkiss Way
✎︎2122/11/77Get Cut Off the Burkiss Way
❌︎2229/11/77How to Succeed in Business the Burkiss Way
✎︎236/12/77Son of the Burkiss Way
❌︎2413/12/77One Hour to Burkiss Way
❌︎2520/12/77Not to be Unwrapped the Burkiss Way
✔︎2627/12/77First Prize the Burkiss Way
✎︎273/01/78Around the World the Burkiss Way
✎︎2810/01/78Ignore these Programme Titles the Burkiss Way
❌︎2917/01/78Complain About the Burkiss Way
✎︎3024/01/78Not the Burkiss Way
✔︎3131/01/78Bruce’s Choice
Burkiss Way Series 4[3] (or maybe 3 after all)
✔︎3231/01/78Start New Series the Burkiss Way
❌︎337/02/78The Last Burkiss Way
❌︎3414/02/78The Next to Last Burkiss Way
Burkiss Way Series 5 (or 4)
❌︎352/04/79Remember the Burkiss Way
✎︎369/04/79Rise from the Grave the Burkiss Way
❌︎3716/04/79Is Britain Going the Burkiss Way
❌︎3823/04/79Is Britain Going the Burkiss Way (Part 2)
✎︎39A30/04/79Repeat Yourself the Burkiss Way
✎︎39B7/05/79Repeat Yourself the Burkiss Way
✎︎4014/05/79Avoid Like the Plague the Burkiss Way
✔︎4126/12/79Eric Pode of Croydon’s Easter Special
Burkiss Way Series 6 (or 5)
❌︎4211/10/80The Man from the Burkiss Way
✎︎4318/10/80Sack the Burkiss Way
❌︎4425/10/80Love Big Brother the Burkiss Way
✎︎451/11/80Write Extremely Long Programme Titles the Burkiss Way
❌︎468/11/80Settle Out of Court the Burkiss Way
❌︎4715/11/80Wave Goodbye to CBEs the Burkiss Way


  1. The inspiration for this was Ib Rasmussen’s collection of Monty Python’s Flying Circus scripts by the way.

  2. Although at the moment, that work has some gaps beyond the obvious difference of Jo/Denise/Christine vs. the rest of them – I’m not super-confident about matching some of the voices to their actors and might have also made the occasional mistake. Any additions or corrections are gladly received.

  3. Actually, this isn’t really Series 4, but just the Burkiss Way messing around with its episode numbering. Lesson 31 and 32 are in fact two halves of one and the same episode, and Series 3 doesn’t actually end until after Lesson 34.
    The lesson numbers will get back in sync with the episode count after the two Lesson 39s, but the internal vs. external series numbering will remain off by one until the end.