Top Ten Elephant Gnome facts

Inspired by an accidental editing error during the creation of the page about elephants, I tried to learn more about elephant gnomes. Initial attempts weren’t succesful, but with a little more tweaking of the prompt I finally managed to steer GPT-J into the approximately correct direction.



GPT-J initially had skipped fact no. 3, so I eventually decided to renumber facts no. 1 and 2 to what are now facts no. 2 and 3 in order to generate an actual tenth fact no. 1.

Elephant gnomes – you might not have even known they exist, but they really are most fascinating creatures. Here are the Top Ten facts about elephant gnomes you'd never have guessed: 10. Elephant gnomes breed like rabbits There are a number of theories about how elephant gnomes breed. One theory says that elephant gnomes are chimps on elephants. They think this because asian elephant gnomes look like human chimps and African elephant gnomes look like human chimps. It also means they like to swim in the sea and eat nuts. Another theory suggests that elephant gnomes are like rabbits and are able to mate in captivity with humans. Although elephant gnomes and rabbits are both ones-and-only-ones, this means they can only mate with each other, or with people that don't mind getting bitten in the face by an elephant gnome's tiny fangs. Boom-Boom, the elephant gnome from Paddington, is probably the most well-known elephant gnome. He's a pale pink and has a backward head. 9. Elephant gnomes orbit the sun Elephant gnomes orbit the sun like the planets. It's a pattern they've had for centuries and it's been found that if you take the images of elephant gnomes that orbit the sun, you can project them onto a screen and they look three dimensional. 8. Elephant gnomes have solar systems Elephant gnomes have solar systems, just like normal gnomes. A tiny number of them have used this ability to travel further into space than the rest of the gnomes. They even created an artificial star. Although the elephant gnomes use this to travel to other planets, it's also possible they did this to talk to their missing god. The elephant gnomes' ancestor is a planet and so the elephant gnomes are half planet. 7. Elephant gnomes have tombs In the past elephant gnomes were buried alive so that they could be found by archaeologists. This is because they would go to great lengths to make sure they would be found again as they were a deeply spiritual creature. Garbage men are taught to look for elephant gnomes because they have a long life and are very loyal to their dead. 6. Elephant gnomes are basically modern fairies So basically, elephant gnomes are like modern fairies. They're an extra-dimensional being that interbreed with humans and are very good at astral projection. Elephant gnomes can also hypnotise people into thinking that they're a table or a statue. It's possible that some elephant gnomes can even make you relive your best night with your ex-girlfriends. 5. Elephant gnomes are sleeping giants Elephant gnomes are sleeping giants. As they're extra-dimensional they can sleep during the day but become active again at dusk. They eat bananas so they can enlarge themselves like the Leviathans in the Bible and the Leviathan in Job. They also sleep in the river and can be found there when their bodies are tide out. 4. Elephant gnomes have a hundred tiny legs Elephant gnomes have a hundred tiny legs. They can't stand up on their own because of this but when they go to sleep they stretch their legs out around them. Some of the gnomes are also extremely jealous so they sleep with their legs crossed. 3. Elephant gnomes can see you without your permission If an elephant gnome can see you it's because it's inside you. 2. Elephant gnomes are really small elephants A large elephant gnome is only the size of a standard elephant. Elephant gnomes are very good at hiding. If they're buried in a pile of books they can look like the books. They also have specially developed triple-jointed elbows so it's possible to bury them without them knowing. 1. Elephant gnomes have been experiencing technology for centuries In the 19th century, an elephant gnome was discovered with a harmonica in its hand. The elephant gnome would play this harmonica to avoid being shot because song, dance and poetry were outlawed in the 19th century. Finally someone took it from him. Comments Advantages Disadvantages Just like elephants, basically. "Now that we have seen the elephant, let's go back to the cave."

Continuing seamlessly from the above Top Ten list, GPT-J turned towards generating a review of what seems to be a multi-episode TV show about the elephant gnomes. As far as I can tell, there is actually no ‘Gombe River’, only the Gombe Stream National Park, but I guess it’s close enough.

Elephant Gnomes is a TV show that seems like it started from a stream of consciousness conversation between Dr.No and Charlie and the Tardis. It's something that has a virtual unknown origin but I'm still quite surprised by how well it's been received by a lot of people. "On a warm evening in an African village, around an open fire, a black-clad figure sat on a cushion and played a strange instrument. The villagers watched, spellbound. Then, the figure, a gnome - a diminutive, half-human, half-elephant - began to sing." With this set up the first episode of Elephant Gnomes is set 10,000 years ago. The intro starts very slow and soothing with a simple drum beat and a low, solemn voiceover. It goes something like this "This is the story of the Gombe River Valley. It is the home of the elephant gnomes. Their traditions are kept alive by memory, faith and truth. Villagers respect these traditions, but they keep their distance. Tribe is not known for its tolerance. The elephant gnomes' methods can be unpredictable. There are some who believe that they are the world's greatest monster hunters. They leave no one behind. To them, a friend is an enemy they must destroy." The first episode of Elephant Gnomes starts with a religious hymn and a quick introduction of the elephants in Africa. Every episode makes some reference to the philosophy of the Elephants and the gnomes in that episode. It's a very simple plot throughout the episodes. Whenever there is conflict or problems the gnomes are there to fix them. They also share a lot of similarities with Elephants and live in the same habitat. "The gnomes are small, with ponderous heads, bulky bodies and clumsy feet. They are built like elephants, with a trunk for a nose, very long legs and a long tail, but they have little indication of intelligence. Yet, they are the most powerful beings in the world." The stories are loosely based on the life of Dr Alexander Merewski, the man who discovered them in the 1960s. He was very famous for discovering them and their first record came in the book "Merewksi's First Discovery of an Elephant Gnome: A Tale of the Gombe River" "To the villagers of Gombe village, the Gombe River woodlands are a mystery. A paradise, where elephants roam, and the gnomes hide. They are the most feared and revered folk in the land. Every evening for thousands of years, they sing and dance to an ancient liturgy of praise. Each is part elephant, part human. But there is another secret to the gnomes -- they are monsters. Little deterrents of nature." The main cast of Elephant Gnomes are the gnomes of the Gombe Valley. These are often the first characters on the screen and are often accompanied by the narration. The gnomes are often faced with the idea of "Monster hunting" this is a story about revenge, of gnomes killing elephants. This is only a tale of 'the book is true' and therefor each episode of Elephant gnomes does have a logical inconsistency. "The gnomes are very small and very powerful. They can change shape at will, and can disguise themselves as anything they choose. They live in a secret world, below the ground. They have no concept of space or time. Their memories are long. They are territorial, vegetarian, and know nothing of the world above." The episodes of Elephant Gnomes span 10,000 years and often include a number of fairy tales. The stories are generally entertaining and are sometimes very funny. The animation has a good level of quality and is very original. The dark and organic atmosphere of the series helps create a very unique atmosphere. "It is said that if you share your bed with an elephant gnome, you will never ache and never get old. While many prefer to lie separately, this is not the elephant gnome way." The characters of Elephant Gnomes are the elephant gnomes of the Gombe River. They are, in a sense, the hosts of the show. The first episode is about their origins and the desire to be discovered. In this episode they are sent into the sleep of death and relive their last days. This cycle of life and death is often repeated throughout the series. "Each gnome has a natural memory, so we will meet them again, in their sleep." It's impossible to list all the characters of Elephant Gnomes as there are a number of new characters in every episode. The characters tend to grow and change as the series goes on. There's a nice balance to the characters of the show that makes them very interesting.