Continuity Announcer (m): We're very sorry about that, but now...
Music: The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy theme tune (Journey of the Sorcerer)
Voice-over (m): The Scriptwriter's Guide to the Galaxy, by a man who would rather write Dr. Who. Starring Peter Jones as this bit.
Music: theme music fades into Oxygene by Jean-Michel Jarre
Narrator (m): One of the most interesting things about the six-headed Omniquargs of the planet Sygosworoldon, in the star system of Grudnivulgar-Actinex, in the constellation of Go-And-Upset-Another-Scrabble-Board-Les-I-Need-A-New-Name, is that they have only one word to stand for all four hundred million nouns, adjectives, prepositions, verbs and adverbs. This is both a good thing, and a bad thing. Bad for them, because since the word is obscene, no one is actually allowed to use it anyway. But good for science fiction scriptwriters, because it enables me to go on and on and on and on about it for sixteen pages every week before we even start the story... (gasps) praying I'll get to a full stop before I keel over into the synthesizer, which I'm having trouble playing anyway, ...
Music: gets louder
Narrator (voice gets quieter, even though he starts shouting): (over) ... because the volume control seems to have got stuck, will somebody please stop this bloody thing!
Music: Synthesizer stops
Technician (m): Sorry!